There are many things that I would like to accomplish this year. I wouldn't necessiarly call them resolutions but commitments. Commitments to myself. Since becoming a mother, I feel that I let more and more things get away from me. My husband and the boys come first and whatever is left over is for me. This year I am trying to change that....I need to put me first (just a little bit)...
Some of the things I want to commit to this year are:
1. Blog more: I really do enjoy this. I might not be that good at it but it does feel good to put thoughts out there. I also like the fact that I can keep a timeline for the boys for them to look back at. There are so many things that they do that I wish I had a record of. Hopefully putting more of them down here will help remember them all.
2. Lose weight: It has been 12 years since my 1st son was born and I never lost that initial baby weight and two more babies later...It is not pretty. I don't want to complain about it or cry over it. I just want to do something about it. I am utimatley the person responsible for how I look so if I want something changed, I am the one that needs to do that. This is where the commitment and putting me first comes in. I have to commit to doing this. I don't have to eat what the boys are eating or snacking on. I have to be conscious of what I am putting into my mouth and I also have to work at buring those calories off. This brings me to my next goal...
3. Running more: I had surgery on my 4 months ago and it has taken me a little while to feel well enough to run and now I do. I ran twice last week and it felt fantastic to be back out there. It is such an accomplishment when I finish a run. I feel so inspired. I want to train for my 2nd half marathon in May. The last one I did was in October 2010 and I finished in 2:58. I wanted to prove to myself that I could do and now that I know I can I want to improve my time. I want to strive to get better and better. My boys are behind me 100% and that gives me more motivation. I can't wait to cross that finish line to see all of their faces cheering me on.
4. Be more PRESENT: I am with my kids a lot but I feel that I am not always present. There is always something to do..laundry, cleaning, cooking...but sometimes those things can wait. There is nothing better to see your kids face when you have dropped everything just to be with them. The laundry can wait 10 more minutes...
I am looking forward to a GREAT 2012!!
Monday, January 9, 2012
Monday, January 2, 2012
Friday, December 23, 2011
12 Years
It is truly amazing that I am sitting here right now writing about Anthony turning 12. I remember when his little, wet slippery body was placed in my arms. All 6lbs 8oz's of him. He changed my life. He made me a mama. He made everything change for me. I was now responsible for another human being and anyone that tells you that's a piece of cake is lying. Parenting has been the hardest thing I have ever done but also the most rewarding. The responsibility is hugh but I am so up for th challenge. As I reflect, on these past 12 years, I can honestly say I have done the best that I could and I am pretty happy with the results. Anthony is a GREAT kid! He is becoming such a fine young man. He is loving and generous and thinks about others and how to make them happy. He is good to his little brothers and for the most part listens to us (He is a pre-teen so he loves to push the buttons sometimes)but all in all, I am very proud of him. He works hard in school and knows the importance of doing well. He takes pride in his work. He is a great friend and has this amazing way of connecting with people. I love his confidence. He can walk into a room of strangers and walk out with a number of friends. I wish I could be more like him. He is beautiful...more and more as he gets older. He has a smile to die for and he is funny. I am blessed to have such a wonderful son and I only hope one day he knows just how much I love him and how much he changed my life for the good. It is bittersweet to watch your children grow. As much as you enjoy seeing them grown and become their own, it is sad because they are no longer your babies. Every year you lose a little bit more as you give them more control over their choices and you can only hope you have done a good enough job raising them to make the right decisions. This is defining year for us. We are giving him more responsiblity but also more freedom and it is soooo hard to let go!! I want him to be my baby forever even though I know that is not possible. I am looking foward to the year ahead and only wish him the best in whatever he decides to do. Happy Birthday, Anthony!!! We love you...
We had his birthday party a few weeks ago and her is a little snap shot of the party...
Friday, December 16, 2011
Photo Card
Captive Shot Birthday
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Monday, September 5, 2011
Friday, July 22, 2011
The UGLY Truth
I sometimes catch my kids saying that they wish they were older. My 7 year old wants to be as old as his bigger bother so he can do everything that he does, my oldest son wants to be 16 so he can be in high school and drive. If they only knew just how great they have it. For the most part, their lives are pretty darn good. sI wish they knew just how much they will miss being a kid. I want them to enjoy their childhood because before they know it, REALITY STRIKES...
Now I am not saying that I want to keep my kids in a bubble or that I don't enjoy being an adult but as you get older, the ugly truth does come out. Life can sometimes throw you a curve ball. It is not alway puppies and rainbows... There are things in life that can Rock you to the core...Things, once out of the box, can never be put back. I learned that pretty early in my adult life. My mom was diagnosed with cancer when I was 22. Stage 4 Lung Cancer to be exact. Just hearing those words, I knew my life would never be the same. It was the hardest 10 months of my life but I was there for the good, the bad, and the Ugly...As much as I wish it didn't happen to her, I wouldn't have changed the last 10 months of her life. It is funny how in your darkest hour, joy can be present. I learned so much from her in those last days. I was grateful to have that time.
Her loss changed me in so many ways. I think I am a better mother and wife but I am also more aware that things can chance in a minute. I do try to cherish every day and be present in everything that I do.
The Ugly truth is that people get sick, people die, bad things happen to good people.... So, when it's good, I try to savor every moment.
Now I am not saying that I want to keep my kids in a bubble or that I don't enjoy being an adult but as you get older, the ugly truth does come out. Life can sometimes throw you a curve ball. It is not alway puppies and rainbows... There are things in life that can Rock you to the core...Things, once out of the box, can never be put back. I learned that pretty early in my adult life. My mom was diagnosed with cancer when I was 22. Stage 4 Lung Cancer to be exact. Just hearing those words, I knew my life would never be the same. It was the hardest 10 months of my life but I was there for the good, the bad, and the Ugly...As much as I wish it didn't happen to her, I wouldn't have changed the last 10 months of her life. It is funny how in your darkest hour, joy can be present. I learned so much from her in those last days. I was grateful to have that time.
Her loss changed me in so many ways. I think I am a better mother and wife but I am also more aware that things can chance in a minute. I do try to cherish every day and be present in everything that I do.
The Ugly truth is that people get sick, people die, bad things happen to good people.... So, when it's good, I try to savor every moment.
Thursday, June 9, 2011
This Boy
How is it that I feel that in the time it takes to write this sentence feels exactly like how much time has passed for my firstborn to be graduating from 5th grade? Where has the time gone? It seems like yesterday, I was knee deep in poopy diapers and spit up and now, he is a beautiful, kind,and generous young man.
He is the one that helped me learn to be a mama.. He is the one that helped me heal when my heart was broken from losing my own mother...
He is now growing up and I have to accept it.
I will start to loosen my grip but for now, we got to enjoy his last field trip. A ride on the Miss Buffalo. I am lucky because Anthony is not embarassed by me. He actually likes when I am at his field trips or activities... Most kids don't want their parents within a 10 foot range. I am LUCKY and I embrass this. This boy loves him Mama...
I was glad to be a part of this trip. It is a rite of passage for them. It is amazing to see how much they have all grown since Kindergarten.
I am sure Anthony will leave elementary school with fond memories. He has built some really strong friendships that I hope last a life time.
I wish nothing but the best for you, Anthony... As much as you think you are growing, you will always be my baby. It might take me a while to loosen that grip, but it s just because I love you so much. I wish I could freeze time and be able to savor this moment. You are an amazing young man and nothing but greatness is in store for you!! I am proud to e your Mom and love you with all my heart.
He is the one that helped me learn to be a mama.. He is the one that helped me heal when my heart was broken from losing my own mother...
He is now growing up and I have to accept it.
I will start to loosen my grip but for now, we got to enjoy his last field trip. A ride on the Miss Buffalo. I am lucky because Anthony is not embarassed by me. He actually likes when I am at his field trips or activities... Most kids don't want their parents within a 10 foot range. I am LUCKY and I embrass this. This boy loves him Mama...
I was glad to be a part of this trip. It is a rite of passage for them. It is amazing to see how much they have all grown since Kindergarten.
I am sure Anthony will leave elementary school with fond memories. He has built some really strong friendships that I hope last a life time.
I wish nothing but the best for you, Anthony... As much as you think you are growing, you will always be my baby. It might take me a while to loosen that grip, but it s just because I love you so much. I wish I could freeze time and be able to savor this moment. You are an amazing young man and nothing but greatness is in store for you!! I am proud to e your Mom and love you with all my heart.
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